Word Count 706
Wellness in Spite of Illness
They stared in disbelief after hearing her words. Did she really say her mother was well? The daughter’s response was so unexpected. Did she really say her mother was good and improving everyday? How could this be? The mother had been given a direr diagnosis, stage four cancer, a glioblastoma brain tumor. How could she be well? Yet the daughter said as much. The daughter proclaimed her mother’s wellness in spite of her illness.
The practice which allowed the daughter to respond with a conviction of wellness is an unpopular and little used approach. It is unpopular because it is misunderstood. It is little used because it challenges our illusion of control we think we have over life. The approach is the practice of surrender. If you or a loved one is battling for life, this approach may feel unappealing. It might sound like giving up. But on the contrary, it really refers to a strategy of allowing. It is allowing life to be as it is in the present moment. The daughter chose this approach as a way of coping with her mother’s illness and as a result, God’s presence and peace entered their lives more fully. They gave up attachment to a preferred outcome, rested in the present moment and, in doing so, felt God’s presence enough that they could proclaim wellness in spite illness.
Unfortunately the practice of surrender, the strategy of allowing, could be called the road less traveled. Some are not willing to accept what life brings. Many can’t suspend judgment. Others desperately cling to categories of good and bad which help frame the circumstances of life. The strategy of allowing, the practice of surrender, simply put, is accepting the present moment as is. It is saying yes to life, no matter what. Some may protest, “But I can’t say yes, something really bad has happened.” None the less, the strategy of allowing, the practice of surrender is accepting the now. It is accepting the facts of what is happening in the present. Some may wonder, when considering this approach, what about action? The strategy of allowing doesn’t prevent action. Action happens in the present moment. The family, whose mother was ill, took swift deliberate action to diminish the cancer. They did everything they could and then presently waited for their action to take or not take fruition. Action happens in the present moment and therefore is compatible with the strategy of allowing, the practice of surrender.
The key to the strategy of allowing, the practice of surrender, is giving up judgment about the facts you are accepting. This is difficult. Culturally, we have not been trained to do this. However the results gleaned from this approach are worth the leap of faith. When one surrenders, when one allows, a space is opened to feel God’s presence, comfort, and confidence more fully. An unexplainable peace has room to enter and be present through any circumstance.
The Bible when telling Jesus’ story never uses the words, practice of surrender or strategy of allowing. These concepts are articulated more in eastern traditions. However Jesus lives and dies these strategies. The strategy of allowing, the practice of surrender, gives Jesus the presence and courage to face betrayal, torture, physical pain, and loss. Jesus is not caught lashing out, bemoaning his predicament, blaming, feeling sorry for himself or trying to escape. He lives in the moment, accepting the facts and reacting to the present. Jesus is what he is today because he surrendered, allowing God to be fully present in his life. Jesus was able to live a broken human life the way he did because he was filled with God’s peace which comes through surrendering and allowing.
Like Jesus, we all struggle with and suffer from human brokenness. The good news is that God’s presence and peace, mends human brokenness. God’s presence and peace makes a person well no matter what the outward condition. In spite of human brokenness, an act of surrender, a strategy of allowing gives one faith and confidence to say, “Yes, I am well, no matter what.” Following Jesus’ example of surrender and allowing helps us know God more fully and experience peace beyond understanding.
Showing posts with label strategy of allowing. Show all posts
Showing posts with label strategy of allowing. Show all posts
Sunday, February 20, 2011
God Sighting
A God Sighting
It was unexpected, the response I received from those who, out of concern, inquired about my mother’s health. I would say, “She is doing well” or “She is great” or “She is improving everyday”. Sympathetic, disbelieving faces acknowledged, what seemed, my wishful, deluded words. After all, how could anyone who was diagnosed with stage four cancer, a glioblastoma brain tumor, be doing well? But the honest answer was, yes, she was doing well. Yes, to understate, she was tired, sleeping the days away. And, yes, our family, over fueled by adrenalin, was tired, too. But, in spite of the fatigue, somehow, I knew, even in the face of a terrible diagnosis, that my mother was doing well. How could I know this? It is hard to say how I could proclaim her wellness in the middle of such uncertainty. This knowing, an assurance which rested deep inside me, like taking for granted the obvious, grounded itself in something other, something infinite and indefinable. It was in this conviction, my mother’s wellness in spite of her illness, where I spotted God.
At first God was easily recognized in the concern poured out to my mother through friends, acquaintances, and even strangers who showed love, care and compassion to our family. There were so many cards, prayers, offers of food, help and companionship, all vehicles for God’s presence in my mother’s life and kin. We were nourished and sustained through these acts of kindness. In addition God was reflected in the humility these gifts brought. Illness humbled and brought us to our knees. We couldn’t do it all ourselves. The experience rendered us, at moments, helpless and dependent. However, mercy and grace flowed through those who helped us, showed concern, and silently cared and in turn, kindly revealed God to us.
Yet there was in this ordeal another place where God stepped forward. When someone receives a serious diagnosis, it doesn’t come in a vacuum. It invades the lives of all who are close. Illness makes everyone near, to some degree, ill. In order to cope with my mother’s diagnosis, I resorted to the art of surrender and unexpectedly bumped into God. To clarify, surrender, in this instance, is not the act of giving up. You can be sure we took swift, extreme, and potent action to combat the cancer. Rather, the surrender to which I am referring is more like a strategy of allowing. It was in surrendering to the process of illness where I spotted God. It was in allowing the illness to be present, where I caught God’s shadow.
After the diagnosis hit our family, it was like I jumped into a white water river, surrendering, allowing the waters of life to rush me down stream. I had to accept an unpredictable and unknown destination. I had to trust the flow of life. Trying to stand up would have gotten me stuck and pinned down by the current. I decided not to resist. The intuition to let go, trust, and feel buoyant, is where God became tangible. God was the water that surrounded, enveloped, and carried me. Sometimes I was drowning, other times I was floating. In surrendering to the flow of life, I didn’t just see God, I felt, heard, tasted, and smelled God. In this God sighting, I have been thoroughly soaked and it was only by this thorough soaking that I have the conviction to know my mother is doing well no matter what the outcome. It is in this assurance that I rest and see God very clearly.
Presently we are in a calm point of the stream. After nearly two years, my mother has been diagnosed as in remission. Really…. she is doing great! And we are all very thankful.
It was unexpected, the response I received from those who, out of concern, inquired about my mother’s health. I would say, “She is doing well” or “She is great” or “She is improving everyday”. Sympathetic, disbelieving faces acknowledged, what seemed, my wishful, deluded words. After all, how could anyone who was diagnosed with stage four cancer, a glioblastoma brain tumor, be doing well? But the honest answer was, yes, she was doing well. Yes, to understate, she was tired, sleeping the days away. And, yes, our family, over fueled by adrenalin, was tired, too. But, in spite of the fatigue, somehow, I knew, even in the face of a terrible diagnosis, that my mother was doing well. How could I know this? It is hard to say how I could proclaim her wellness in the middle of such uncertainty. This knowing, an assurance which rested deep inside me, like taking for granted the obvious, grounded itself in something other, something infinite and indefinable. It was in this conviction, my mother’s wellness in spite of her illness, where I spotted God.
At first God was easily recognized in the concern poured out to my mother through friends, acquaintances, and even strangers who showed love, care and compassion to our family. There were so many cards, prayers, offers of food, help and companionship, all vehicles for God’s presence in my mother’s life and kin. We were nourished and sustained through these acts of kindness. In addition God was reflected in the humility these gifts brought. Illness humbled and brought us to our knees. We couldn’t do it all ourselves. The experience rendered us, at moments, helpless and dependent. However, mercy and grace flowed through those who helped us, showed concern, and silently cared and in turn, kindly revealed God to us.
Yet there was in this ordeal another place where God stepped forward. When someone receives a serious diagnosis, it doesn’t come in a vacuum. It invades the lives of all who are close. Illness makes everyone near, to some degree, ill. In order to cope with my mother’s diagnosis, I resorted to the art of surrender and unexpectedly bumped into God. To clarify, surrender, in this instance, is not the act of giving up. You can be sure we took swift, extreme, and potent action to combat the cancer. Rather, the surrender to which I am referring is more like a strategy of allowing. It was in surrendering to the process of illness where I spotted God. It was in allowing the illness to be present, where I caught God’s shadow.
After the diagnosis hit our family, it was like I jumped into a white water river, surrendering, allowing the waters of life to rush me down stream. I had to accept an unpredictable and unknown destination. I had to trust the flow of life. Trying to stand up would have gotten me stuck and pinned down by the current. I decided not to resist. The intuition to let go, trust, and feel buoyant, is where God became tangible. God was the water that surrounded, enveloped, and carried me. Sometimes I was drowning, other times I was floating. In surrendering to the flow of life, I didn’t just see God, I felt, heard, tasted, and smelled God. In this God sighting, I have been thoroughly soaked and it was only by this thorough soaking that I have the conviction to know my mother is doing well no matter what the outcome. It is in this assurance that I rest and see God very clearly.
Presently we are in a calm point of the stream. After nearly two years, my mother has been diagnosed as in remission. Really…. she is doing great! And we are all very thankful.
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